Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Frus-station

"The train arriving on platform no. 2 is 12 coach slow local for Churchgate. It will stop at all the stations."

             Woah. Mumbai. Local trains. Traffic. Rains. Traffic. The Sea. Traffic. Night Life. i haven't witnessed one. Traffic.This is Mumbai for me. It's a mad mad place with mad mad people. Mum, Wiser men kept telling me Mumbai is not that easy but hell i wanted Mumbai, i wanted to live life the Mumbai way. Man, what a dumb ass i was. A Complete Idiot.

            Well, the above mentioned statement welcomes you when you go to Andheri Station. That's where i go.Daily. I catch the train to Churchgate. The first day i took this train, i was full of enthusiasm, positive energy, I had no place to sit in the train but still i was happy standing at the door, wind rushing through my hair. I felt confident. Felt i could take over the world. Felt like i was the only one. Again, A Complete Idiot.

           A few days, weeks passed before i realized that i wasn't the only one. There were thousands of girls (or should i say women :| ) like me carrying a LARGE handbag in one hand, cell phone in the other and ears plugged to an iPod. By LARGE handbag i mean a LARGE handbag. Extremely large and shiny one. It has to be large coz it carries everything from a comb to make up kit to atleast 3 tiffin boxes to a pair of shoes and what not. And shiny, that's because people here are freak.

            Initially, i wondered why were the people here in so much of a hurry. Hurrying to climb the train, hurrying to get down, hurrying for everything. Then i was introduced to the Mad Mumbai Race (MMR). MMR is basically a virtual race. To explain in details it would be when people are in office they are hurrying up work and thinking of going home early. When people are at home they are thinking of leaving early to avoid traffic. When they are on the platform they are thinking of jumping into the train and grabbing the seats, when there is an empty train coming they are still jumping into the train grabbing the preferred seats. When they are getting out of a train they want to rush to catch an early bus. When they are in the bus they want to rush to catch the earliest train. They talk to their husbands, yell at their boy friends, scold their children, fight with the 'bai' on phones. Their life is a mobile phone. Now i know, why Mumbai is a fast paced city. They have to win the MMR.

If this is what a mumbaikar is, i don't want to be one. Although i am afraid i have become one already. :O
Let's hope my train doesn't stop at Frus-station.
Well it does stop there daily, otherwise there wouldn't have been a topic for this post. *Sigh* 




 

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Who Moved My Cheese?

Who Moved My Cheese? And Why?
And why is it difficult for me to accept this fact? Why can't i accept it and move on? Why instead of changing myself, i want to change the situation?

It's not that i can't adjust. That, i perfectly can.
It's not even that i haven't read the titled book. I read it ages ago.

Perhaps it is because i do not want to change for others, due to others. But i forget it's not that i will change for them, i will change for myself. I will change for my improvement. My stubbornness will only harm me and my loved ones, which i certainly do not want.

In today's dark world, very few people value you and love you and want better things for you, and it is for them you must change.

Change is inevitable. Growth is optional. Choice is mine.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Growing Up...Growing Down...

It seems like a million, zillion years passed since i went to school. Every morning while undertaking the painfully short-distance-wise-but-long-time taking journey in a three wheeled man made machine which has gained no less an importance than a god’s own vehicle... yes the black coloured, cacophonic autos... I see these little children wearing half pants with a dirty sweater, almost bursting square bags, water bottle in one hand and a lollypop or a Rs.2 Pepsi (is it Rs.2 now or Rs. 200, you can’t say!) in the other hand...

I remember when I went to school my some of my worries included the high probability of me getting punished because of reaching late or because of having overgrown nails or wearing lose socks (which happened at the most twice a month when the other pairs were drenched..esp during the rainy season). Forgetting books was not much a worry because i was particular in that department although the one day in an year when i would forget a history textbook, my teacher used to get this brainwave of punishing or worse taunting the girls who had forgotten theirs!

Other things that disturbed me and all of my fellow mates was that her lead pencil was the shortest or her crayon stick wasn’t ‘fat’ enough or worse what if it rained in the games period and you wouldn’t get to go out and play your favourite game of throw ball! Or worse for people like me who liked running like horses or like phoebe on the ground when the only games class used to get converted to some stupid boring ‘Marathi’ class.

And when it was your birthday, you would announce it proudly a week earlier to the entire class about the oncoming auspicious day. And on the auspicious day, you would get ‘sweets’ for everyone irrespective of the fact that they have brought gifts or not. And the whole class very enthusiastically sang a ‘Happy Birthday’ with loud, happy claps and you standing, blushing in the front and whispering a ‘Thank You My friends’ in the end... and then you would get a wet kiss by the teacher on your cheek (which i generally avoided and tactfully wiped off). All in a Happy, happy birthday... no mental math calculation of treat (if any) money or unknown faces asking for ‘treat’.

But alas, good things die early. Now that i am dreading the oncoming of my ‘auspicious day’ i wonder how and why things change. Now it’s more like ‘Happy Birthday (I don’t care), TREAT!(is all that i care about and i can contri any small amount of money for the formal cake and oh yeah i won’t even sing because i am drooling over the cake).

I don’t want a fancy cake with my name in icing. I don’t even want anyone to wish just for the sake of it... all i want are a few wishes that come from heart (and some gifts too! bwahaha) because i need the wishes baby! I am growing old and i am not a tad bit happy about it! I wish i just don’t get up on my birthday and directly wake up on the next day, just skip the 24th! As Joey says ‘Why God! Why?!’

Man, i refuse to grow up.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Can't say bye.

Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work.
Someone would leave.
Someone always leaves.
Then we would have to say good-bye.
I hate good-byes.
I know what I need. I need more hellos. -Charles M. Schulz

He has said the exact same words which keep bobbing up and down in my mind whenever i have to leave a friend to another city..another world..

Every time i say "bye" a dementor swoops over sucking the soul out of me. Tears dry up somewhere, and what is left within is a hollow feeling, a frightened heart, an emptiness. The train leaves to another station, the whole world moves ahead and i am still there, refusing to step forward without my friend. What remains with me is only the echoes of our endless mirthful laughter, our unadulterated joy, our innocence, our child-like talks; unaware of the ghosts that await us, the monsters waiting to divide us...

Unlimited talktime can help but can never create the magic that is weaved when friends are together... come back dear friend..come back.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The Black One..


The Black One refers to my newly purchased Spanish Guitar with F-curve holes.. wait..did i just write this in small uninteresting letters?? Well, i must be stupid then!
Because now me..yeah me.. is the co- owner (unfortunately it is also co-owned by my brother) of this gifted musical instrument! :D
Back in school my best friend and I had this dream...oops, these dreams... that we had promised each other we would make them come true before we die... kinda like the bucket-list.. It included stuff like flying a plane, bungee jumping, going for a road trip, owning an island, smacking someone hard on the face esp when that person is an excruciating- pain- in -the- neck,playing in a band.. well these are not exactly "dreams" dreams... but we had promised each other we would make these little things happen!
But then distance separated us... kilometers came in between..and we were no longer conjoined.
Why do i always wander away from the topic? Anyway, due to intense boredom and a real REAL enthusiasm to learn a guitar (and the fact that my bro's guitar lessons..his emotional atyachar..) let me to buy this awesome piece... and it has caused sort of a verbal fight between me and my best friend (even though she is in the rasgulla land). yeah,i had told her we would be learning guitar together, but we were kids that time.. we dint mean it.. :P
And now here i am all set to learn guitar from my kid brother... who has given me initial exercise of "up down" and finger exercise on the frets..and it has made me realize..IT'S NOT THAT EASY AS IT LOOKS... i had just seen people with curly open hair,tongues out, moving their fingers in rapid action and it had led me to thinking... hey, those long- hair-tongue-out guys can do it..it must be a piece of cake... BUT NO!... i have suddenly realized how disproportionate my fingers are! they are short, stubby, not at all flexible...and running my fingers on the strings gives roughness and scratches... ugh! and while practicing i do take out my tongue in concentration and look super uncool! (now i know the reason behind the tongues out! :P )
And whenever i think of giving up... the Black One leans on the the wall and winks at me... and i start all over again! many people (guys) say guitar is their best friend (esp after a gal has ditched them) and my brother is following their lead... hmm. But right now all i m focusing on "happy birthday 2 u", "old mac Donald had a farm" and "dhoom machale" and my long term goals are "summer of 69" and some other songs..i hope i will be able to play soon...

I am planning to give a name to the Black One... something respectable like "Sir Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington" or something ultra-Marathi like "wamanrao" or something common like "Bob"...
I guess Black One will be fine for now...

P.S. : i love my first 6-string :) tongue out! :P and rock sign! \m/

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

pop! goes my heart

pop!goes my heart... is the latest song sensation that has gripped me! Not because Hugh Grant has sung it or has danced cutely in the movie (well..but that also could be one of the reasons.. ;) ...anyway...)

I said I wasn't gonna lose my head, but then
POP! Goes my heart.
I wasn't gonna fall in love again, but then
POP! Goes my heart.
And I just can't let you go,
I can't lose this feeling.

Thus goes the chorus of the song, which is my favorite part for the sheer reason of the simplicity with which the idea is conveyed...
Because "losing my head" is my favorite sport. Losing my head over the things i have lost and not able to find, losing my head over "what to wear" in college, losing my head in thinking "am i a loser or what?", losing my head when i see a particularly cute "my kind of a guy" with a blonde... and then pop! does go my heart...

And about "falling in love" don't even talk about it. Because that's my second favorite. Be it love for a guy (which is a lot many times! here lies the beauty of pop! going my heart) , be it love for a vacation spot (which i generally never want to leave... be it the awesomness of Gangtok or the sea-breeze of Mumbai... ), be it the non existent college department ( !..i knw!), or be it watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S., attachment is my weakness... and to detach myself from these simple things doesn't only let my heart go pop! but it goes bang! and i really just can't bear this feeling of going, moving away or detaching... (doesn't mean at all that i am a cry baby...coz i m not!) it's just that everytime this happens there is a teeny tiny bubble bursting in my heart and the phenomena of losing my head takes place...

i guess it's a disease or just that i am stupid...

but pop! goes my heart... ;)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Shadow Of the Day

Don't know why but i just love this song...

I close both locks below the window
I close both blinds and turn away

Sometimes solutions aren't so simple
Sometimes good bye's the only way

And the sun will set for you
The sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day
Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you


In cards and flowers on your window
Your friends all plead for you to stay

Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple
Sometimes good bye's the only way

And the sun will set for you
The sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day
Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day
Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

And the shadow of the day
Will embrace the world in grey

And the sun will set for you

Guess, i have just realised that i am going to miss my college immensely i have switched back to listening Linkin Park songs. They somehow make me nostalgic and the train full of memories runs across my mind...